This morning i would like to share some of my feelings. (skalian blajar writing in english ehehe).
Maybe this kind of feeling, you guys had it too many times. That is jealousy.
Today i work in an airline company. I graduated from university that many people says it has good reputation. Sometimes i have times to open my facebook acc in my office. When i saw my college friend’s photos, i felt jealous that he/she had a better work than I had. Sometimes i feel like i’m a loser. Is he/she actually better than me? So he/she has a better career than me? After i thought about this, i feel i’m weak. i’m noone… just an ordinary guy. i’m not multitalented, i dont have any special skill / ability… all those negative feeling keep popping out in my mind… All of those pictures made me jealous…
I’m an introvert guy. I often think about many things anytimes anywhere. I know my college friend well. I know their talent. I know that i’m not superb as they are.
I have a girlfriend who really loves me. She always cheers me. She often reminds me about other people who has ‘unlucky’ living. Everyone has their own problem. Rich guy, poor guy, smart person, dumb person, noone has a perfect living in this world. Sometimes we drop, we fall, it’s a common thing. But when we wake up it’s like we are newly reborn again. The most important thing is how can we wake up? We cannot live alone. We need someone, to support us, to remind us. God’s blessing shines from people who loves us.
I’m an introvert guy. The positive thing is i can manage my emotion. But sometimes it causes problem. When people around asking me about my feeling or condition, i often hide it. About my jealousy, i can only share to my girlfriend. My family lives in different city. I’m the youngest. Although i’m the youngest, i feel like i carry big responsibility for my family. Cause my bro n my sis haven’t work yet. They have a working to do, but not a permanent job. And their income is not so much. My mom’s already passed away. So i always think that i have a big responsibility for my family.
When i’m in a bad mood, jealousy become my worst enemy. But luckily i have girlfriend who always cheers me. That jealousy become my power. I dont want to lose compare to my friend. Everyone has their own way. I dont want my family and my girlfriend down. I want to see them happy. They cant see me in this suck situation.
I often help my girlfriend to finish her college homework. When i finish helping her, she praise me… I never thought that i can be that useful for her. When she praise, she smile… And that makes me really happy. When she sad, i comfort her. When she cry, i hug her… Then she thanks me. This is it, she makes me feel important. She makes me feel useful. Jealousy? Never thought about that.
Try being useful to others then all negative feelings include jealousy wont appear inside u ! GBU.